Nobody warns you about this.
We grow up believing that only narcissists play this dirty game called future-faking—making empty promises about the future to keep you trapped in the present.
But here’s the brutal truth: even the sweetest, nicest, most loving people can future-fake you.
I’ve seen it. I’ve lived it. Maybe you have too.
Future-faking isn’t always the mark of a monster. Sometimes it’s fear. Sometimes it’s immaturity. Sometimes it’s just plain weakness dressed as charm.
And you’ll never see it coming.
Until now.
Here are 10 shockingly real signs you’re being future-faked by someone who may not even know they’re doing it.
1. They Vomit Big Plans You Didn’t Ask For
You don’t even bring up the future.
But they launch into it like a salesman at a used car lot.
“We’ll move to Spain next year. You’ll love it. I’ll write books on the beach. We’ll drink sangria at sunset.”
You never even asked.
They build a future in words because the present isn’t enough.
Pay attention. This is not love. This is marketing.
2. The Magic Word They Can’t Stop Using: “Someday”
“Someday we’ll go to Bali.”
“Someday I’ll quit my job and start that business.”
“Someday you’ll see how amazing I can be.”
Someday is a trap.
It’s a magic bubble that floats just out of reach. No timeline. No specifics. Just enough dream-dust to keep you hooked.
Real love speaks in dates, plans, calendars. Fake futures live in someday. Always someday.
3. They Dangle The Future Like Bait for Your Loyalty
“Just wait, babe. Stick with me. When things settle, it’ll all happen.”
Like you’re in some kind of emotional layaway program.
They make your patience the price for the dream.
Except real relationships aren’t transactions. Real love shows up now. Not in 2027. Not after the next raise. Not after they “figure themselves out.”
If they need you to wait until life magically fixes itself, they’re not building a life with you.
They’re buying time.
4. They Escape Into Future Fantasies Every Time You Argue
Try this:
Raise a real issue.
“Why don’t we spend time together?”
Watch how they run—not out the door, but into the future.
“But imagine how amazing our life will be once we move! Once we start fresh! Once we get married!”
Classic distraction.
They sell tomorrow to escape the hell of today.
If they cared about fixing now, they’d stay here with you. In the mess. In the hard parts.
But no. They run.
5. You’re More in Love with Their Promises Than Their Presence
Here’s the sickest part.
You start to prefer the dream.
The made-up life they keep describing feels better than the crap you’re living now.
Their fake plans give you hope. Butterflies. Delusions.
But reality? Reality feels dull, confusing, cold.
This is the final stage of future-faking: when you fall for the fantasy more than the human.
And they love that. Because as long as you chase the promise, you won’t see the truth.
6. They Parrot Your Dreams to Seem Like Soulmates
You share your deepest wishes.
“One day I want to start a charity.”
Next week? They’re suddenly passionate about charities.
“I’ve always dreamed of running one too!” they say, eyes wide, heart fake-beating.
They mirror you. Borrow your dreams. Pretend they had them all along.
It’s cheap magic. Instant false compatibility.
Real love discovers you. Fake love becomes you.
Discover: 7 Sneaky Ways Shame Tricks You Into Loving a Narcissist (Even When You Know Better)
7. They Squirm When You Mention Action
“So when are we booking that trip you promised?”
Awkward pause.
“Well… now’s not the right time. Things are crazy. Let’s wait till next month.”
They shift. Fidget. Change the subject.
Because future-faking dies when touched by action.
Make them pick a date, a plan, a budget—and watch their fantasy collapse into dust.
8. Their Big Promises Always Show Up When You Pull Away
Ready to walk?
Suddenly they’re down on one knee.
You threaten to leave? They promise therapy, commitment, babies, forever.
Every time you drift, they flood you with dreams. New plans. Fresh fantasy.
It’s not love. It’s panic.
They fear losing control. So they weaponize the future to pull you back.
You’re not in a relationship. You’re in a trap.
9. They Weaponize Your Insecurities To Deepen The Hook
“You’ve been so hurt before. I’ll give you the fairytale you deserve.”
Sounds sweet, right?
It’s poison.
They know your fears. Your wounds. Your tired heart.
And they use those against you—feeding the fantasy that they’ll save you from your past. One day.
But “one day” never comes.
They just keep promising until you’re too exhausted to leave.
10. Their Daily Life Screams “Liar”
They can’t even plan dinner, but they swear they’ll buy a house next year.
They ghost your texts but swear they’ll be the world’s best partner someday.
They forget your birthday but swear they’ll never forget an anniversary.
Their actions betray the dream.
Their little choices kill the big promises.
Look closer. The future they sell doesn’t match the life they live.
And that’s the most shocking sign of all.
Suggested reading: 10 Brutal Truths About Why Good Women Stay With Men Who Break Them
The Ugly Truth About Future-Faking
Future-faking isn’t always done by villains.
Sometimes they believe their own lies.
Sometimes they want to be the person they pretend to be.
But belief doesn’t build a life.
Action does.
If they can’t show up in the present, they can’t show up in the future.
And if you keep buying the dream, you’ll wake up years later holding dust.
Don’t trade your life for someone else’s fantasy.
FAQs
1. Is future-faking always intentional?
No. Some people future-fake because they’re delusional, not evil. They believe their own hype. But the damage is the same.
2. Can nice people future-fake too?
Absolutely. Even “good” partners can unknowingly future-fake because they can’t handle the discomfort of the present.
3. How do I confront a future-faker?
Ask for specifics. Deadlines. Concrete actions. Watch how they react. Their discomfort will tell you everything.
4. Is future-faking a form of manipulation?
Yes. Whether on purpose or not, it manipulates your emotions and keeps you hooked on hope instead of reality.
5. Can a relationship survive future-faking?
Only if the person stops faking and starts acting. Without change, the relationship will rot from the inside.
Now Your Turn
Have you been future-faked?
What promises did they make you fall for?
Tell your story in the comments. Your truth might wake someone else up.
Or maybe this post woke you up.
If so—share it. Someone out there is holding onto a dream that’s slowly killing them.
Help them see the light.
John Emmanuel is a results-obsessed relationship blogger and founder of Top Love Hacks, dedicated to helping you level up your dating and relationship game by motivating you to be in control of your love life.
