Learn how to be confident with women and improve your dating life with these 9 practical strategies that can help you overcome anxiety around women.
I get it.
You don’t want to be nervous, awkward, and shaky whenever you find yourself in the company of one, few, or many girls.
You want to be the lady’s guy—being in the company of many attractive women chatting, flirting, and having fun with them.
But talking to any girl feels like your body is switched to an unusual mood which makes your heart beat faster than normal, makes you sweat uncontrollably and your voice completely trembling as you tend to speak faster than you normally do. In short, it’s freaking awkward that you’d rather avoid talking to any girl at all.
So you try to figure out how other guys effortlessly hang out with different kinds of women.
And all you get is: just be confident!
Confusing isn’t it?
Well, I’ve got you covered!
Because I’ve put together a handful of tactical practices that will supercharge your confidence around women.
So without further ado, let’s dive in…
#1. Learn To Make Eye Contacts
Your ability to courageously make and maintain eye contact with women will supercharge your confidence around them more than anything else. Here’s why:
Looking into her eyes tells her that you’re secure and sincere. It tells her that you’re super confident and the good news is:
Women find confidence attractive!
So how do you master the art of making eye contact with women when a single thought of it seems nervous, awkward, and uncomfortable?
Well, if that is the case here are a few tips that will help you out:
- Start with her mouth and I bet she’ll never notice.
- While at it, steal one or two glances at her eyes.
- When you get more confident try to lock gaze with her as much as you can remember to divert to your starting point (her mouth) when it gets uncomfortable.
Note: Too much eye contact is just as bad, if not worse than limited eye contact ’cause it makes you appear aggressive. A general rule of thumb is to break eye contacts whenever there’s a silence in the conversation.
#2. Learn To Accept Compliments
Do you always feel uneasy whenever you’re complimented?
Instead, gracefully accept any compliment you get.
Because whenever that hot chick tells you that you’re looking good, deflecting the compliment with silly questions like: “Really?” Reeks of insecurity and lack of confidence.
Secure and confident alpha males who know how to be confident with women always accept compliments without a second thought and so, you should because you’re one.
If she says she likes your hair just smile and say thank you.
#3. Master The Art Of Speaking Slowly
Many guys find talking to women extremely awkward. While other guys don’t even see it as a big deal.
So what’s the difference between the two?
Speaking pace or speech rate.
Speaking slowly makes you appear confident, organized, and clearheaded. It makes you feel more relaxed and in control, it enhances your credibility and allows others to understand you better.
To be more confident with women, you need to master the art of speaking slowly but not extremely slowly.
#4. Keep An Eye On Your Body Language
Do you normally cross your arm when you’re having a conversation with a girl?
Do you constantly look at your watch while on a romantic date?
Do you always have no clue of what to do with your hands when you’re talking to a hottie?
You’re simply displaying a bad body language and It’s time for a change.
Always keep your head high, with your shoulders back and your chest puffed out…
Avoid fidgeting, looking at your watch, crossing your arms, or putting your hands in your pockets…
The bottom line?
Negative body language can make you appear untrustworthy, timid, uncomfortable, nervous, and awkward.
For this reason:
#5. Be Yourself And Avoid Faking
Will she love me for me? Won’t it be better if I pretend to be someone else?
We get questions like these a lot and they usually come from our own imaginary image of our flaws, weaknesses, and imperfections.
Want to know the big mistake most guys make?
Trying to act in certain ways or pretending to be someone else.
Most guys don’t know that there’s a considerable chance of disappointment when they try too hard to act out of sync with their true selves hoping to make the best of impressions on women.
The underlying reason?
They hate themselves for everything they’re not instead of loving themselves for everything they are already.
As a result:
They get themselves in a mousetrap that is difficult to break away from.
But if you want to be confident with women.
If you so desire to leave effective impressions on women…
You need to embrace being you and love yourself exceedingly.
Because we all are not perfect, we all have our own flaws, we all have our own strengths, and the good news is:
Those are the things that make us all unique and interesting.
That’s not a typo.
You’re unique, interesting, and special in fact, you’re a rare gem!
All you need to do is:
Love yourself and be real.
And you’ll be marveled at the wonders it will do to your confidence when you’re making your first impression with women.
#6. Subdue Your Negative Thoughts
Don’t you think it will be impossible to approach women when you have lots of negative thoughts flooding your mind?
After all, they’re the enemies that have been holding you back from achieving the result you deserve.
If you do, you’re not far from the truth…
Because unless you figure out how to break through the walls of limiting negative thoughts you’ll never be confident around women.
Here’s why that’s important:
Negative thoughts wages war against you and if they defeat you, they’ll take you captive and make you a slave.
They’ll subdue and reduce you to nothing, they’ll turn you into a weakling…
And the worst part?
They’ll compel you to always follow their dictations, they’ll tell you all sorts of lies and force you to believe them. For Instance:
Whenever you want to approach that knockout you’ve been crushing on, they’ll be like:
“You can’t just go up to her and start talking to her”
“you always get nervous on dates”
“you have to say something clever, otherwise she won’t like you”
“you don’t even know what to say on dates”
And helplessly you’ll believe everything you heard and do whatever they wanted you to.
You’ll never go up to her and tell her anything because you’ve been compelled to believe that you can’t…
You’ll give up all dreams of making her yours because you now believe you’re too nervous to try…
You’ll be disappointed in yourself because you believe you are too dumb to come up with clever things to say to her…
But if you want to feel more comfortable and relaxed before approaching women…
You need to subdue your negative thoughts.
And the most effective way to do that?
Is to confront those doubts and leave them with nothing to anchor onto.
Pay attention to the discouraging voices in your head and when you hear something like:
“There’s no way I could approach her!”
Don’t believe it instead challenge and explore it using questions like:
“Who else does something like that and how do they do it?”
“What if I approached her differently, or learned a specific skill, could I change the result?”
In all circumstances, the answers to the above questions will help you break through the walls of those limiting thoughts and enhance your confidence around women.
#7. Challenge And Resolve Your Fears
If you don’t combat those fears that always cripple you into inaction, you’ll always find it difficult to socialize with women. Here’s why:
Your fears use your doubts against you and oblige you to make big deals out of small things.
As a result, thoughts like:
What if she walks out on me if I approach her?
What if I walk up to them and couldn’t say a word?
What if other guys see me disgrace myself?…
Will discourage and stop you from making advancements towards those lovely girls you know you’re supposed to be hanging out with.
So how do you defeat your paralyzing fears?
The best way to cripple your limiting fears is to rationalize and mentally challenge them by asking yourself questions like:
What’s the worst thing that could happen? Is it really that bad?
What do I need to do or what skill do I need to learn to avoid that bad outcome?
What’s the best thing that can happen?
Most times, you’ll discover that the worst-case scenarios are either not too bad, or can be totally averted by doing something differently or by mastering and developing new hacks.
#8. Arm Yourself With Encouraging Dating Skills And Abilities
Winning a battle when you’re armed with the right weapons is pretty easy. And to win the battle of confidence with women, here’s what you need to do:
Learn and master one, few, or many dating skills and abilities like:
How to confidently approach a woman
How to effortlessly strike up a conversation with a girl
How to ask her out
How to turn small talk into a meaningful and emotional conversation
How to be flirting and playful
How to smoothly transition from conversation to kissing
How to turn friendships with women into something more physical…
Mastering some encouraging dating skills will give you that push that will magically improve your confidence around women.
Because let’s face it, you’ll always have a tough time approaching women when you don’t even know how to go about it.
But if you master one or more skills, things would be better off because you won’t be clueless on how to approach that “knock out” across the bar.
#9. Go Easy And Don’t Force It
Never think you’ll only go for the hottest women you’ll ever come across cause you might get nervous at the dying minute and get your mind filled with negative thoughts, self-doubts, and flimsy excuses that will make you back-out and ditch the idea of approaching one.
Instead, take things easy and start small.
Taking everything easy and starting small will magically help you build up the confidence to hang out with the most stunning girl you have or will ever meet.
The more comfortable you become in breaking the ice and being social with anyone you’re not so attracted to, the easier it will be to become the lady’s guy you always dream of.
Because the extraordinary confidence, you require to approach that gorgeous girl can only be built up gradually.
For this reason:
Try to start up conversations in low-pressure circumstances with whoever happens to be around – guys, girls you’re not attracted to, the wait-staff – anybody.
The Bottom Line On How To Be Confident With Women
If you don’t feel confident around women, you’ll not only feel nervous and awkward, you’ll feel insecure and will stand no chance in hell of being the lady’s guy you always dream of as you’ll be unattractive to women.
Want to be attractive to women?
Then, you have to be confident around women.
And the best ways to do that are perfectly outlined above all you have to do is:
Arm yourself with these hacks and defeat all awkward and nervous feelings, all doubting and limiting thoughts, and all crippling or paralyzing fears that hinder you from socializing with women and be the super confident man you’re meant to be.
What other ideas can you add to this list that I may have not mentioned?
John Emmanuel is a results-obsessed relationship blogger and founder of Top Love Hacks, dedicated to helping you level up your dating and relationship game by motivating you to be in control of your love life.