There are millions of advice promising to make you a good girlfriend on the internet.
There’s no flawless blueprint for how to be a perfect girlfriend. You just need to have some understanding of how men think and what they need in a relationship.
Here are 10 signs that you’re actually a great girlfriend your man should be happy to have.
1. You Don’t Nag Your Boyfriend
The worst thing a man can ever wish for is to have an endlessly nagging or nit-picking girlfriend.
That’s why it’s really great to have a girlfriend who is loving enough to let go of small and even big wrongdoings.
As Diana Marie Collins of yourtango.com puts it, “Constant nagging can make your partner feel infantilized and as if they’re a disappointment to you. It also makes the nagger feel authoritarian.”
As Diana said, a nagging partner is completely unattractive as they appear to be authoritative and forcing the relationship to become a parent to child relationship instead of an intimate and affectionate relationship.
And if you aren’t obsessed with finding or pointing out tiny details or errors which are sometimes insignificant, you are a loving girlfriend every girl should learn from.
Recommended reading: 5 Types of Men You’ll Regret Falling For
2. You know How To Make Him Feel At Ease
When someone is upset and disturbed by someone else who refuses to take responsibility for their wrong deeds, he or she needs a listening ear.
We are all humans and we occasionally get angered by our bosses, colleagues, employees, friends, or even unrelated people like the waitress who works in a restaurant.
At times, we get beating up or frustrated by difficult situations or circumstances of life.
And at such times, all we need is an opportunity to vent and express all our anger, bitterness, and frustrations.
That’s why we can’t help but be appreciative of a partner who knows exactly how to make us feel at ease when we’re upset.
The bottom line is…
If you offer him a shoulder to cry on if you manage to always talk him out of his anger, bitterness, and anxiety…
If you know exactly how to restore hope and feelings of “everything is going to be okay” to him, you’re already the best woman he can ever dream of.
As Suzan Dalia of mindfulfillmentality.com explains, a great girlfriend will be by her man’s side, calming him down, making him laugh, kissing and hugging him, and making him focus on something else that’ll make him feel calm.
Related reading: 7 Insecure Habits That Makes You a Terrible Girlfriend
3. You’re Not Clingy
This one seems a bit straightforward but still needs a little explanation. Being clingy freaks-ff relationships.
As no one will want a partner who doesn’t allow them to have their own space or a partner who constantly invades one’s privacy.
It’s not a bad idea to make one’s boyfriend feel needed but going overboard with it and being excessively clingy is simply a turn-off.
But if you’re not trying too hard to get ahold of your boyfriend, if you don’t get upset that he doesn’t reply your texts minutes after sending it even though he is busy…
If you don’t ask silly odd questions about his social media, if you don’t get mad when he doesn’t go out with you, you’re clearly not a clingy girlfriend. And your boyfriend should be thankful for that.
A decent girlfriend won’t want anyone to stick to her like a magnet let alone, try to be a pest to her boyfriend.
Suggested Reading: Maternal Envy: 5 Reasons Why Moms Jealous Their Daughters
4. You Have Your Own Voice
It doesn’t make sense to always go with his opinions, because it keeps you off balance and reeks of low self-esteem.
Relationships don’t work out well with one person’s opinions always, as it gives the relationship a one sided direction.
Having your opinions will make him see things from your perspective and will take your relationship to greater heights.
Being confident enough to voice out your feelings is one of the attractive qualities of a great girlfriend. And if you possess this quality, you’re certainly one.
Because a great girlfriend will not change her mind unless he has won the argument and convinced her to buy his point of view.
5. You Easily Get Along With His Friends And Family
Even though, you are not expected to love all your boyfriend’s friends especially if he has close female friends.
It’s only right to be a little friendly with his friendship cycle. No one wants a partner that will separate them from their social groups.
And if you happen to get along easily with a few of his friends (even the females), you’re certainly not a bad girlfriend.
Because great girlfriends easily fit-in with their boyfriend’s family and friends as they believe in their boyfriend’s happiness.
Understanding and respecting your boyfriend friends and family will always make you a great friend and companion.
Read also: 9 Habits That Will Help You Attract The Right Men Into Your Life
6. You’re Positively Interested In His Passions
Experts and certified couple therapists have already declared that showing interest in your partner’s interests is one of the two essential things couples need to have in common.
This is far from being compatible or sharing the same interests. Although people believe that compatibility is the key to successful relationships. But the truth however is, the only necessary thing is having mutual respect for each other’s interests despite the differences.
There’s no doubt that you’re the world’s best girlfriend if you’re supportive and genuinely interested in your boyfriend’s interests and passions.
Having or showing even the slightest bit of interest in your partner’s passion or interests will make you both a happy and cheerful couple.
And that’s exactly why your man will be delighted to have you as his woman if you show little interest in his passions.
7. You’re Supportive Of His Goals
An electric bulb can never work without a power source.
In the same way, a relationship without mutual support is already in the dumps. Whether it’s emotional support, moral support, or any form of support, no relationship survives the test of time without them.
If you’re in any way supportive of your man’s dreams, goals and expectations, if you go the extra mile to help him achieve them, if you get proud, excited, and enthusiastic when he accomplishes his goal, there’s no doubt that you’re a great girlfriend or partner.
Who doesn’t want a woman that genuinely supports his dream? Your boyfriend is bound to feel lucky to have you if you happen to always show your support towards his goals.
8. You Challenge Him To Become Better
Just like you might find him annoying if he occasionally questions your beliefs, assumptions, and opinions…
Just like you might consider him to be judgmental or deprecating if he constantly tells you that your “big achievements or wins” are not enough. That you can do more. He’ll also feel the same if you do the same.
But if you eventually work a bit harder and the results came out amazing, you’ll feel like the only person who believes in your potential and helps you go beyond your limitations is this amazing boyfriend.
Do you think he won’t feel the same way about you if you help him become better or do better than he initially believed he could? Of course, he will!
As a passionate local amateur footballer, during one of our local football tournaments, I was able to net two goals and one assist on my team’s first match.
As an attacking midfielder, I felt really great and proud of my little win as I hopped for more of the same. But to my girlfriend, I did only a little. She told me that I could do better, that I could have the most assists in the tournament.
Knowing that there’re a lot of capable players in the competition, I was not happy with her. But somehow, I worked my ass off and ended up with the best player of the competition award. And I’m truly thankful for the encouraging words of my girlfriend. She motivated me to give in my best. And that’s why I feel fortunate to have her!
9. You Respect His Privacy
It’s really frustrating to have a girlfriend who constantly invades one’s privacy. Who wants a partner that frequently spy on his or her phone or tries to know who he or she is talking to?
Intruding or invading a partner’s privacy is an act of rudeness and disrespect. Nobody wants to be disregarded and disrespected like that.
But if you aren’t interested in spying on your boyfriend’s messages, social media chats, or who he’s talking to on phone, you’re indeed matured. In fact, you’re a great girlfriend.
A clear-minded girlfriend doesn’t even want someone to disturb her privacy let alone, have time to intrude into someone else’s privacy because she knows how important some level of privacy is in a relationship.
Mikaela of loveisrespect.org says:
“Having privacy doesn’t mean that your partner is hiding anything. Everyone has the right to privacy, and no one should have to give it up to be in a relationship. Doing things like asking your partner for passwords to social media, email, their phone, or expecting them to tell you where they go and who they’re with violates their basic right to privacy, and can be a form of digital abuse.”
As Mikaela said, you’ll only be indulging in digital abuse, if your insecure feelings lead you to ask your partner for passwords to social media, email, their phone, or wherever they go. Because their refusal to provide an answer doesn’t necessarily mean they’re hiding something.
10. You Don’t Try To Change Him
When your partner is so bent on changing and molding you into perfection, the binding force that keeps you together is ruthlessly weakened.
Whether it’s religion, politics, or appearance, or even family and friends, nobody wants a partner that’ll force him or her to change their views and opinions towards any of the aforementioned.
Because it’s disrespectful and creates an emotional barrier between couples. But if you honestly accept your man despite his imperfections, you’re one in a million.
A great girlfriend loves and respects her man for who he is. Instead of striving to change him into something he’s not.
“Love him for who he is or let him go.” ~Alexandra Sakellariou
John Emmanuel is a results-obsessed relationship blogger and founder of Top Love Hacks, dedicated to helping you level up your dating and relationship game by motivating you to be in control of your love life.