The First Time I Heard His Voice
I came to the church for healing.
I didn’t find God.
I found him.
His voice was the kind that doesn’t scream, but settles into your bones like it’s been there before. Like it’s home.
I was sitting in the last pew that Sunday, pretending to listen. My friend Nneka had dragged me there like a last resort. After my engagement crashed and burned, she said I needed Jesus.
I needed air.
But then, Pastor Timi took the mic.
He wasn’t the senior pastor. Just the assistant. Young, composed. No flamboyance, no theatrics. Just words. Real, raw, quiet words that told me I wasn’t the only one whose faith was held together by threads.
And somehow, I believed him.
The First Time He Looked at Me Like That
It started with casual greetings.
Then, the kind of eye contact that lasted one second too long.
Then, late-night messages asking how I was coping. “Just checking in.”
Then, volunteer meetings that didn’t end with prayers.
They ended with questions.
The kind you don’t ask unless you’re trying to touch someone’s soul.
“What did your father leaving feel like?”
“Why do you always play strong?”
“What do you really believe in now?”
No man had ever asked me things like that. Not even my ex-fiancé, Emeka.
Not the way Timi did.
And every time I answered, a piece of me unzipped.
The Girl He Was Meant to Marry
I knew he was engaged.
Everyone in church did.
She was perfect. Pastor’s daughter. Light-skinned, soft-spoken, always in lace.
The kind of woman who says amen with her eyes closed and knows how to make small jollof for house fellowship.
I couldn’t compete.
I wasn’t trying to.
But when Timi started avoiding her eyes and finding mine across the altar… I knew.
He was trying not to fall.
Same as me.
That Night in the Rain
We had just finished a youth outreach. It rained heavily. The others had gone.
We stayed back to clear up.
My hair was soaked. My blouse stuck to my skin. He offered me his jacket, and I laughed.
“You think this is a movie?”
He didn’t laugh.
He looked at me like he’d been waiting to for years.
“Adaora,” he said, voice low, “I’ve tried. I’ve prayed. But I can’t pretend anymore. It’s you. You’re the one my soul won’t stop wanting.”
And I stood there.
Not as a church girl. Not as a broken woman.
But as a heart that had waited too long to be chosen.
I touched his chest.
But then I pulled away.
Not because I didn’t want him.
But because love shouldn’t start in hiding.
The Day He Called It Off
Two weeks to his wedding.
He called off the engagement.
There were whispers. Elders frowned. His spiritual mentor refused to speak to him.
He told them he needed time. That he was walking away from ministry.
But he didn’t tell them why.
Only I knew.
He said he wanted a love that didn’t come with rehearsed roles and religious quotas.
He said he wanted me.
The Last Time I Saw Him
We planned to meet by the lake.
We said we would leave town. Start again somewhere small. Away from pulpits and expectations.
But he never showed up.
I waited for three hours.
Then his sister called.
He was gone.
He had left in the middle of the night for a story in Jos. A conflict zone.
“He said he needed to make peace with the man he used to be,” she told me.
They found his body six days later.
Wrong place. Wrong time.
God, I hate that phrase.
What Remains
I stayed away from church for months.
When I returned, I didn’t sit in the back.
I sat in the front pew, wearing black. No one asked why.
I light candles every Friday now.
One for his soul.
One for the love we almost had.
And one for the pieces of me that finally stopped apologizing.
Final Takeaway
Some people aren’t meant to stay. But they still shape who you become.
And when love doesn’t end the way you dreamed… sometimes it still sets you free.
FAQs
1. Was the story based on real events?
No, it’s fictional but emotionally grounded in universal themes of forbidden love and sacrifice.
2. Why did Timi leave for Jos?
He was a photojournalist before ministry and went back to confront parts of himself he abandoned.
3. Did Adaora ever love Emeka (her ex-fiancé)?
Yes, but not the way she loved Timi. Emeka felt safe. Timi felt true.
4. Why did Timi stay in the church so long despite being unhappy?
Out of duty. Fear. Expectations. The weight of being a “man of God.”
5. Will Adaora find love again?
Maybe. But she’s no longer looking to be saved. She’s saving herself now.
Now Your Turn
Have you ever loved someone you weren’t allowed to choose?
What did it cost you?
Let’s talk in the comments.
John Emmanuel is a results-obsessed relationship blogger and founder of Top Love Hacks, dedicated to helping you level up your dating and relationship game by motivating you to be in control of your love life.
